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Blue Sky Pining

Below are the 25 most recent journal entries.

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  2008.05.16  11.19
Like I am SOOO over postmodernism

The plague of our age is consumption. We are a generation whose sores have turned deadly - as advertising, hyper communication and
has stripped all validity and authenticity from culture for years we're starting to see a body count from it. As the third world reaches
and joins us into a world where everything is bought, sold, and held as status symbols we watch as that same consumption begins to end the world.
The postmodern world allows nothing to be excluded from buying and selling, and ultimately all factors of a person are objects. Your personality
, your history, and your physical self is no more than a fancy iPod - they will be used, become obsolete, and become discarded.

The Dance Macbre
In the plague world of the Black Death people began to wrap themselves in the vestaments of death. Death was inevitable, and all social
mores were thrown out. In fact a concerted effort was made to embrace death, to sin as much as possible, as both virtous and wicked were dying.

And today we find the same thing. The "moral relativism" the right decries so often is very much a product of their own systems. When
NOTHING can be free from commidity all ideologies are nothing more than competing brands. Is it any wonder that people, facing nothing but
a nihilistic future devoid of any authenticity or meaning wrap themselves in the discarded symbols of that same consumerism that is draining their
lives and leaving them less than human? T Shirts from the 70's bearing beloved symbols cast into the pit grave of calculated obsolescence?

Yeah, that's right - all this was just a defense of stupid hipster ironic fashion sense. That and I'm reading shopping in space right now. But this whole thing freaks me out in a big way.


  2008.05.14  16.52
It's all about the garden of eden . . .

Or probably what I said years ago while blacked out that wound up with me recieving a rotten apple in the mail . . .

Been sober for 33 days now. Cold stone, not a drop or bump. Weird.

And evaluating what the fuck I'm doing exactly. I mean, I quit drinking for a bit (open ended time) because I obviously wasn't dealing with anything, just watching it pass me by rather than actually existing as a person. Well, that and it was causing some real problems in my life I think. Most of those were probably coming more from drugs than booze, but it's all one and the same ultimately.

It's not about substance, it's about consciousness. Which bring us back to the title - abusing alcohol (and I don't mean getting shitfaced, I mean using it as a solution to dilute fucking everything so you can't think or feel shit) is a way of trying to put the apple back on the tree, to abandon the burden of thinking, of consciousness. The pleasures and limitations of a dumb beast. You can do it with anything - submerge emotion and thought into sensation. Booze is just well-suited because it's a depressant. But (and this IS a recovery saying, I'll kick my own ass later) it's also a low-grade spiritual awakening. And a great way to keep you away from one, as it allows you to focus primarily on yourself by paradoxically keeping you from yourself. So is sobriety a luciferian self-actualization? I have realized it's much more than abstaining, it requires a constant self-awareness that most people just don't ever look into. But at what point is that just navel-gazing?

See I really want a fucking drink right now, which is why this is on my mind. And I CAN have just a few - but what's the point of that? I also want to get fucking ripped, and just see what happens. Drink is a GREAT way to jumpstart things sometimes, when you feel you're just standing still. I started drinking really heavily about 6 years ago precisely for the dionysian loss of control - I didn't want to be trapped in any way, I didn't want to be a part of a culture that I personally find to be sick, degrading, and more meaningless even than throwing away your life to a barstool. At least that is somewhat honest. I felt myself being drawn into that with age, and open eyed self destructive behavior is a way to avoid that. Of course I hoped I could dodge the bills for it as well, but I was always willing to take them if I had to.

Or it used to be that, I dunno. For a while I was just on auto-pilot, and felt like drinking was trapping me itself. Wasn't travelling because I spent my money on booze, etc. But I'm still somewhat trapped - have to work a job I hate, have the limitations of myself for now. It's getting much better lately - I have my mind back for one thing. But how much of it anyone can really have is up for debate, and it's often just not enough to make things good.


  2008.05.05  14.48
The Coming Collapse of the Middle Class

Watching this rather than working on work or the band website. Long, but definitely worth watching so far.


UPDATE: Wow. This touches on what has been a verbotten subject of economics - the fact that women entering the workforce (either as a cause or effect historically), and the subsequent move to two-income families has been worse off for middle and lower class people (i.e. 90% of people). Yes, the family makes more money, but so does everyone else. And supply and demand means that scarce resources, especially housing and medical care, will go up in price just as much. I'm not saying that "women should stay in the home" - but somebody, regardless of gender should economically.

When your primary asset is your labor (you work for money), more workers means you'll probably make less. In consumables this is usually offset by the increase in goods, which lowers the price by a similar if not greater amount. But in situations of limited supply such as housing land, clean air, and good medical care there's no way to offset this price boost due to competition.

Also includes some discussion of school funding, test scores, and housing prices as they relate. Definitely worth watching.


  2008.05.05  11.25
Ear training for the iPhone

I love this thing. Great for people with crappy pitch sense like me.



  2008.05.01  13.57
The glockenspeil is the hot new instrument

Seriously, heard like 5 bands on radio today using it.

Good one here - http://www.last.fm/music/Menomena


  2008.05.01  10.14
Pedal for Peace

Pedal for Peace - May 31

Raises money for UFPJ, the umbrella group that brought you the 2004 RNC protest umong others. $40 registration, $25 for low-income or student.



  2008.05.01  10.14
More bad L train entertainment

Can we just have the scene wars again already?


  2008.05.01  10.12
Series on songwriting in NYTimes opinoin

Rossana Cash, Andrew Bird, Suzanne Vega.



  2008.05.01  10.12
Charity show tomorrow

Charity show tomorrow

Tomorrow we're playing at Matchless (right next to McCarren park) to support WardMorFest, which sends WardMorford to Afganistan (you know, the shithole of the universe) to train nurses so maybe people there can not live in the 12th century anymore.

If you don't come, you hate freedom. Simple as that.


  2008.05.01  10.11
Build your own synth videos . . .


Watching them now, don't know if they're any good. However since a modular system costs a minimum of $1500 to make a tone might be worth it.

Oh, and look what's on the same site - How to build and play theremins.


  2008.05.01  10.11
Road trips and music

Trying to think up a list of the greatest driving road trip songs of all time. Inspired by Buffalo Springfield, which is the sound track for almost every road trip my family took when I was little.

What else? Tom Petty's Full Moon Fever, Butthole Surfer's Independent Worm Saloon . . . anything?

Oh, and Western Metal is a pretty cool term. Not as cool as Gothic Americana though.


  2008.05.01  10.08
Thomas Friedman gets pied!

There may just be a god after all . . .

The maifesto given afterwards:

Thomas Friedman deserves a pie in the face...

* because of his sickeningly cheery applaud for free market capitalism's conquest of the planet
* for telling the world that the free market and techno fixes can save us from climate change. From carbon trading to biofuels, these distractions are dangerous in and of themselves, while encouraging inaction with respect to the true problems at hand.
* for helping turn environmentalism into a fake plastic consumer product for the privileged
* for his pure arrogance.
* as the only way to compensate for the ridiculousness of having this fool speak on Earth Day.

On behalf of the earth and all true environmentalists — we, the Greenwash Guerrillas, declare Thomas Friedman's "Green" as fake and toxic to human and planetary health as the cool-whip covering his face.


  2008.05.01  10.07
The cost of driving

From the AAA

While the cost of some driving expenses declined since the start of 2007, higher gasoline prices have more than offset these savings and pushed the overall cost of vehicle ownership and operation higher this year," said the Auto Club's Automotive Research Center Manager Steve Mazor. In 2008, AAA estimates it will cost $8,121 to own and operate a new passenger car driven 15,000 miles per year. This compares to $7,823 per year in 2007; or 52.2 cents per mile.

Yeah, NYC is expensive. But the last year I was in Phoenix I drove about 100 miles a day, 5 days a week. I save about $700 a month by not having to have a car using the average (mine was WAY higher, due to being a bad insurance risk - because I didn't always have insurance, not tickets or accidents).

OK, even being generous and halving that by cost of living stuff (everything costs more here, but not THAT much) I'm still paying about $200 a month in rent once you figure car savings. Add to that the smugness of not killing the world and the country, and it's a bargain.


  2008.04.11  13.26
Oh Virb, why haven't I been around?

So much better than myspace.

Not better than last.fm though.

Listening to Daniel Tosh, trying to figure ways to promote my band The Gulf Of Michigan. Want to move and stop making trash altogether. Live off the land type shit - or boats and piracy. But the whole shithouse is going up in flames soon.


  2007.07.12  15.22
Stop the madness


  2007.07.12  12.37
Holy shit I am a drunken ass

OK, when responding to someone's AIDS joke when drunk, first check they're not positive.

Quick tip.


  2007.07.11  13.47
Oi oi

Fuckwads - pretty sure I've been ditched. Or maybe it's just the fucking ex-dream last night. Worst fucking thing about getting into a relationship is not the breakup, it's when months later your subconscious decides that it's time to do a greatest hits album.

Listening to punk - who wants to go to a REAL fucking shit bar tonight? Pinball, cheap booze, and a hope of violence is crazy delicious.

Going home for a visit soon.

Hangin' out with Lars down on 6th street
he knew I was in trouble
I was feeling much like the devil
there was something burnin' deep inside of me

ran into three Puerto Ricans
these girls took us to the funhouse
where we played a lonely pinball machine

hangin' on the corner of 52nd. and Broadway
cars passin' by but none of them seem to be goin' my way

New York City well I wish I was on a highway
back to Olympia...

I'm having a hard time understanding
it gets all too demanding
she's all gone and I'm stranded
something burning deep inside of me

all I know it's 4'o'clock and
she ain't never showed up
and I watched a thousand people go home from work

how many times will it take me
before I go crazy
before I lose everything
something burning deep inside of
me ran into three Puerto Ricans
those girls took us to the funhouse
I don't wanna be alone again.

That's enough bad mood for the month. No time to let my life get in the way of living.


  2007.07.10  12.34
Killed my iPod

Shit shit shit . . . had a bottle of beer in my bag that broke, killing my iPod.


  2007.07.05  15.51
iTunes is in love with Social Distortion

2 days off drinking and this already?

Allright, allright, I'll pour whiskey to kill the existential angst.


  2007.07.02  10.31

Activities included kickball, dodgeball, dizzy bat, cheer offs, and yur mom.


  2007.06.29  23.29
I need a garage for bikes

This is pretty tempting, at least for $300 . . .



  2007.06.29  12.49
Powers of 10

The Eames were great.

If you haven't seen this before watch it now.


  2007.06.28  12.04
No work today

Decided to stay home and read books on American generations instead.


  2007.06.27  16.01
Today's bender will be brought to you by Bob Dylan

Mr. Zimmerman, thanks for helping to raise me.

The sweet pretty things are in bed now of course
The city fathers they're trying to endorse
The reincarnation of Paul Revere's horse
But the town has no need to be nervous

The ghost of Belle Starr she hands down her wits
To Jezebel the nun she violently knits
A bald wig for Jack the Ripper who sits
At the head of the chamber of commerce

Mama's in the fact'ry
She ain't got no shoes
Daddy's in the alley
He's lookin' for BOOZE
I'm in the KITCHEN
With the tombstone blues

The hysterical bride in the penny arcade
Screaming she moans, "I've just been made"
Then sends out for the doctor who pulls down the shade
Says, "My advice is to not let the boys in"

Now the medicine man comes and he shuffles inside
He walks with a swagger and he says to the bride
"Stop all this weeping, swallow your pride
You will not die, it's not poison"

Mama's in the fact'ry
She ain't got no shoes
Daddy's in the alley
He's lookin' for BOOZE
I'm in the KITCHEN
With the tombstone blues

Well, John the Baptist after torturing a thief
Looks up at his hero the Commander-in-Chief
Saying, "Tell me great hero, but please make it brief
Is there a hole for me to get sick in?"

The Commander-in-Chief answers him while chasing a fly
Saying, "Death to all those who would whimper and cry"
And dropping a bar bell he points to the sky
Saying, "The sun's not yellow it's chicken"

Mama's in the fact'ry
She ain't got no shoes
Daddy's in the alley
He's lookin' for BOOZE
I'm in the KITCHEN
With the tombstone blues

The king of the Philistines his soldiers to save
Put jawbones on their tombstones and flatters their graves
Puts the pied pipers in prison and fattens the slaves
Then sends them out to the jungle

Gypsy Davey with a blowtorch he burns out their camps
With his faithful slave Pedro behind him he tramps
With a fantastic collection of stamps
To win friends and influence his uncle

Mama's in the fact'ry
She ain't got no shoes
Daddy's in the alley
He's lookin' for BOOZE
I'm in the KITCHEN
With the tombstone blues

The geometry of innocence flesh on the bone
Causes Galileo's math book to get thrown
At Delilah who sits worthlessly alone
But the tears on her cheeks are from laughter

Now I wish I could give Brother Bill his great thrill
I would set him in chains at the top of the hill
Then send out for some pillars and Cecil B. DeMille
He could die happily ever after

Mama's in the fact'ry
She ain't got no shoes
Daddy's in the alley
He's lookin' for BOOZE
I'm in the KITCHEN
With the tombstone blues

Where Ma Raney and Beethoven once unwrapped their bed roll
Tuba players now rehearse around the flagpole
And the National Bank at a profit sells road maps for the soul
To the old folks home and the college

Now I wish I could write you a melody so plain
That could hold you dear lady from going insane
That could ease you and cool you and cease the pain
Of your useless and pointless knowledge

Mama's in the fact'ry
She ain't got no shoes
Daddy's in the alley
He's lookin' for BOOZE
I'm in the KITCHEN
With the tombstone blues


  2007.06.27  13.58
The Fiery Furnaces are playing on Sunday

Too much to do, truly. They play Studio B on the 1st.

Not only that, but they did a fucking CLASH cover! Get it here.


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